D E N I A L

I was dying, denying and I didn’t want to stop
The pressure, the sickness the pain
I didn’t want to stop
I knew something was not right
I knew something was missing
I was in denial
Living in lies,
Living in sickness
But I didn’t want to stop
A part of me always wanted to go back
But the other part was always stronger
I felt alone
I felt ashamed
I had no one
But I didn’t want to stop
I didn’t think anyone would care
I didn’t think anyone understood…
The pain, the inner tears. The hatred
But I didn’t want to stop
It started building up
It started becoming a part of me
I knew something was wrong
I knew I should have spoken
I knew I should have stopped
But I didn’t want to stop..
I don’t know if its help I need
Or if its simply just rejuvenation
But…I still don’t want to stop.